How to create your best relationship by doing the least amount of work

Happy Luvy Day! Since it’s Valentine week, I thought we’d talk about how to create your best relationship possible in the fastest amount of time by doing the least amount of work. 

We tend to believe a relationship is something that’s supposed to make us happy, yet we often find ourselves miserable with the person we’re committed to. We start our relationship convinced we’ve found our soul mate, the one who completes us, the one who dances on moonbeams—but now they’re the SOB who just doesn’t get us. We’ve nothing in common. They just aren’t going where we’re going… 

We think maybe if we worked harder at our relationship, really get focused on what’s not right and fix that (read: if THEY would just do what we say), then we’ll be happy. But I can guarantee more focus on what’s not working is death to any relationship, romantic or otherwise. 

Why?

What you give your focus to brings more of the same. You can’t have what you want by focusing on what you don’t want. Remember, the universe is limitless and says YES, YES, YES to everything. You are the one who directs this awesome creative force by what you think, feel, say, and do.
 

So what to do? We’re committed to this relationship but we’re miserable. Are we supposed to have to live this way?

Absolutely not. Joy is your natural way of being. Your partner’s too.  
 

The fastest way I’ve found to live your best life with someone you love is to butt out of their life. Stop trying to make them something they’re not. Stop needing them to be the moon and stars for you. Stop trying to make them think like you do, or feel like you do. And stop making them wrong if they don’t think like you do or feel like you do.
 

Seriously, how would you like it if someone tried to tell you how to think and feel?
 

The opposite is also true too. Stop thinking you have to think and feel like your partner in order to be closer to them. Stop thinking your happiness depends on what your partner thinks and feels and does. And stop thinking you can make your partner happy (or anyone).  
 

It truly is that easy. Just stop. Stop trying to control your partner’s (or anyone’s) thoughts and feelings because you can’t. And you’re going to feel just plain awful every time you try. And so is your partner.

And guess what?
 

The second you stop thinking something’s wrong because your partner doesn’t think like you, you’ve freed a huge amount of creative space to look at what feels joyful for YOU. And as you focus on this new thought, you take your thought tentacles out of your partner’s energy field. They no longer feel your harsh judgment, which makes them a lot freer to be who they are—which is usually that person you fell in love with.

If you’d like to better understand what’s happening in your relationship right now and tools for a new focus, book a Healing Touch energy session with me.  If you’d like to learn a couple powerful techniques for having more energy, watch my free video Take Back Your Energy.